Tuesday 26 August 2014

Living the Dream

So I was just thinking this morning about how great God has been to me. I am able to do (more or less!) most of what it takes to keep this farm running and there's some great confidence and convenience in that.  From running tractors, trucks and trailers to fixing fences I am no different than generations of rural women before me.  I do what has to be done.  And don't get me wrong, I couldn't do it without my amazing husband and family and friends. I am not a feminist.  I dont particularly love the feminist movement. But I love that I've had teachers, friends and amazing family along the way who've supported opportunities to do and pursue whatever I wanted, even if it was a non - traditional role.

So I was pondering the "dream". Sometimes we jest in a sarcastic fashion, when things are particularly nuts, that we're just "living the dream".  But really, we are.  Its just that we were a little misguided into thinking that any dream worth dreaming might just be handed to us like a winning lotto ticket. And so I kept on coming back to why, and how, to keep pressing on.

I have found an answer, but not one thats all sweet and tied up with a pretty ribbon. It's
hard work and trust in my faith that God will provide.   Its late nights (emergency vet calls, loading hay bales at 10pm, and working horses into the late hours of the night) and early mornings (doing barns before Bren leaves for work at 7, hauling to horse shows at 4am and braiding 6 horses before classes start at 8).  Its hard work. Not romantic, "pretty" work,  but dirty,  exhausting and sometimes grueling work.  Its hauling kids around and forcing them to do slave labour (it "builds character" right? ).  It's having a job that you cant procrastinate or put off until tomorrow.

But what else is it? Why do we do it?

Its seeing the face of a young girl ride her horse proudly into the show arena, achieving all her goals, and coming out, smiling with pride regardless of prizes  knowing she nailed it!  It's my kids running out to visit all their barn "aunties", helping them out, and maybe scoring a quick spin on their ponies.  Its seeing that sick, skinny horse gaining weight, shining up and getting a sparkle back in his eyes, and swearing he's thanking you for helping him feel better.

Its walking up from the barn, late at night, holding Brendan's hand and looking to the beautiful starry sky to thank God for gracing us with far more than we deserve.

I think the reason a lot of people miss out on "living the dream" is because sometimes it doesnt look (or smell) as pretty as they imagined.  They get caught up in complaining about exactly the thing they would previously have given anything to get.  Disillusioment takes over and clouds gratitude.

I don't have all the answers but I believe we're a lot tougher than we think we are.  And I know when I start my day being thankful, instead of being critical and negative and throwing a pity party, I give God room to work some amazing things in my life. I know if I work hard, at the end of the day, He'll pick up where I left off.

Don't be afraid of hard work.   Don't be afraid of failure.  Laugh it off.  We've all been there.  Pick up, dust off and get right back at it.  To end with an old cliche...  the dream is not just the destination ... its the dance you do on the way there.


So be brave, be joy-filled, and just keep on "living the dream"!